Thoughts

Being Authentic,being Cause, Being Committed, Being Integrity

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My mentor Michael Reuter Director of Leadership at Seton Hall writes:

In the Insigniam Quarterly’s Disruptive Leadership Issue, Werner H. Erhard and Michael C. Jensen share their thoughts on The Four Ways of Being That Create the Foundation for Great Leadership, a Great Organization, & a Great Personal. Life. The power of their message is in their focus is on being not on doing. For it is in extraordinary being through which exceptional doing flows.

Being Authentic – Being and acting consistent with who you hold yourself out to be for others, and who you hold yourself to be for yourself.

Being Cause In the Matter of Everything In Your Life – Being Cause in the Matter is a stand you take on yourself and your life. A stand is a declaration you make, not a statement of fact. Being Cause in the Matter is viewing life from and acting from the stand that “I am cause in the matter of everything in my life.” Being willing to view life from this perspective leaves you with power. You are never for yourself a victim.

Being Committed to Something Bigger Than Yourself – Being committed to something bigger than oneself is the source of the serene passion (charisma) required to lead and to develop others as leaders and the source of persistence (joy in the labor of) when the path gets tough.

Being A Person or an Organization of Integrity – Integrity for anything is the state of being whole, complete, unbroken, sound, in perfect condition. For a person and any human organization, integrity is a matter of that person’s word or that organization’s word being whole and complete — nothing more and nothing less. Integrity is required to create the maximum opportunity for performance and quickly generate trust.

What beautiful simplicity and awesome power in the being we choose: authenticity, being the cause in the matter of everything in my life, being something bigger than myself and being a person of values. It is in the great leaders’ hands to choose. Steve Maraboli writes: “You were put on this earth to achieve your greatest self, to live out your purpose and to do it courageously.” Be more than you ever dreamed you could be… and more… so much more.

Buddha tells great leaders: “Thousands of candles can be lighted from a single candle, and the life of the candle will not be shortened.” Be that candle who lights the world and burn brilliantly with passion and love of life and for those whom you serve. Life is so very good.

You Have Everything You Need

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My good friend and Mentor Michael passed this on to me:

​J.M. Barrie in his 1904 book, Peter Pan, writes: “The moment you doubt whether you can fly, you cease for ever to be able to do it.” The relationship of Barrie’s words to leadership is found many years later in Stephen Covey’s definition of leadership: “Leadership is communicating to people their worth and potential so clearly that they are inspired to see it in themselves.” It is this beautiful and profound belief that great leaders have of themselves – that joyous understanding of who they are in all our extraordinary gifts and human imperfections and what they can achieve. The belief gives boldness, daring and they eyes to see the world differently, a world than can be. Bob Moawad wrote: “The best day of your life is the one on which you decide your life is your own. No apologies or excuses. No one to lean on, rely on , or blame. The gift is yours – it is an amazing journey – and you along are responsible for the quality of it. This is the day your life really begins.”

Remember always: “A bird sitting in a tree is never afraid of the branch breaking, because her trust is not on the branch but on its own wings.” May you soar high and always believe in yourself. Embrace the words of Ayn Rand: “The question isn’t who is going to let me; it’s who is going to stop me.” Fly with majestic and powerful wings. The world is yours. We are what we believe. On your journey, it may be necessary to take counsel from the words of Ann Bradford: “Tell the negative committee that meets inside your head to sit down and shut up.” Please take care – “You have everything you need, if you just believe.”

6 Questions that will set you up to be super successful

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My good friend and mentor writes:

To: The Great Leaders Who Have a Passion for Continuous Learning.

In his recent blog posting, 6 Questions That Will Set You Up to Be Super Successful, Marshall Goldsmith writes: “When it comes to self-reflection, asking yourself active questions rather than passive questions changes the focus of your answers – and empowers you to make changes you wouldn’t otherwise consider!” Passive questions are those which “can cause people to think of what is being done to them rather than what they are doing for themselves.” His example is: “Do you have clear goals?” Passive questions open the door to understanding the “static position” – the current situation and if it exists and why. These are helpful in information gathering for continuous improvement. Active questions, on the other hand, call for a response to “describe or defend a course of action.” “There is a huge difference” Goldsmith writes, “between ‘Do you have clear goals?’ and ‘Did you do your best to set clear goals for yourself?’”

Goldsmith offers great leaders six active, behavior-altering questions, The Six Questions that Will Set You Up to Be Super Successful!:

Did I do my best to increase my happiness?
Did I do my best to find meaning?
Did I do my best to be engaged?
Did I do my best to build positive relationships?
Did I do my best to set clear goals?
Did I do my best to make progress toward goal achievement?

It is in these small steps of quiet self-reflection that great leaders become extraordinary leaders – a simple change in questions that changes behavior to be and become more than they ever dreamed they could be. John Holt writes: “Ask questions to find out something about the world itself, not to find out whether or not someone knows it.” There is so much beauty and wonder yet to be found… in ourselves, the world and in those whom we serve.

Seek First to Understand

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Simple stories sometimes capture the joy of profound truth and inspiration. A friend recently shared a story about the deep wisdom of Stephen Covey’s teaching: Seek first to understand, then to be understood.

A lovely little girl was holding two apples with both hands. Her mum came in and softly asked her little daughter with a smile: “My sweetie, could you give your mum one of your two apples?”

The girl looked up at her mum for some seconds, then she suddenly took a quick bite on one apple, and then quickly on the other. The mum felt the smile on her face freeze. She tried hard not to reveal her disappointment.
Then the little girl handed one of her bitten apples to her mum, and said: “Mummy, here you are. This is the sweeter one.”

No matter who you are, how experienced you are, and how knowledgeable you think you are, always delay judgement. Give others the privilege to explain themselves. What you see may not be the reality. Never conclude for others. Which is why we should never only focus on the surface and judge others without understanding them first. For example:

Those who like to pay the bill, do so not because they are prosperous, but because they value friendship above money.

Those who take the initiative at work, do so not because they are foolish, but because they understand the concept of responsibility.

Those who apologize first after an argument, do so not because they are wrong, but because they value the people around them.

Those who are willing to help you, do so not because they owe you anything, but because they see you as a true friend.

Those who often text you, do so not because they have nothing better to do, but because you are in their heart.

It is in that beautiful momentary pause – the suspension of judgment – in which genuine caring and a willingness to trust and believe in someone is given. It is the great leaders’ vulnerability to be open to something more that perceived, heard or felt. It is an offering of respect, a moment of listening to stand in the shoes of another.

With business associates, friends, acquaintances and in the intimacy of family, these moments occur. They will capture your attention because they provoke an emotional response. Recognize this, and take that nanosecond of time to stop, listen and seek first to understand. You may just hear and feel like the mum who heard: “Mummy, here you are. This is the sweeter one.” As Leo Buscaglia wrote: “Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.” In every interaction, may you choose to turn a life around. That is the stuff of greatness.

The Cosmic Bank

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On a spiritual level, the universe is a giant cosmic bank where we make withdrawals and deposits on a daily basis.

Our withdrawals include health, security, love, the breath that we take, even the fact that we can open our eyes in the morning!

We make deposits in the bank when we volunteer, help others, or do small kindnesses like saying hello to someone we don’t necessarily know well or even care about. Every day that we do actions of sharing beyond our comfort zone, or extend ourselves as a good friend, or pray not only for ourselves but for others as well, we are making a deposit into our cosmic bank account.

The cosmic bank is open 24/7, and our thoughts, words, and actions are constantly adding to or subtracting from our account. But we have to keep making deposits; we can’t rely on some good deed we did three years ago, hoping it will tide us over. Just as we need to eat every day, we need to share every day, too.

Today, take a moment to check the status of your account. Are you taking time every day to make a deposit?

To: The Great Leaders Who Have a Passion for Continuous Learning

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From my beautiful friend Michael Reuter:

“Most men live lives of quiet desperation.” These words from Henry Thoreau’s book Walden are used as the introduction to Philip Humbert’s article, Can’t Life Be Better Than This?
He cautions: “Don’t let that happen to you!”
Every single day, we are faced with the choice of how we will live. We can worry about the news, or we can build the life we want. We can expend enormous energy on big, exciting problems “out there” (about which we can do little) or we can address the challenges of living the life we choose. It’s up to each of us how we use our time and talents, every day.
Day by day, we can build memories with our children, or we can focus on tragedy. We can read the best books ever written, or we can watch more television. We can build our businesses and develop our skills, or we can fret about the economy. We can move and dance and make our own music, or we download more iTunes.
Throughout history, most people have been hard pressed to do more than survive, but that is not us! We have the best education and richest resources in history! We can enjoy fine wine for a few dollars a glass. We can enjoy great music, or great conversation, or listen to the smartest people on earth, often in person, and anytime via recordings. The world is our oyster!
Humbert tells great leaders: “This week, determine that you will live your own life, in your own way, to the very best of your ability. Be as eccentric and unique and joyful as you truly are! Do one new thing, or do at least one thing differently. Spend one hour exploring the highest and best that is in you.” Open your eyes to see new possibilities, new dreams that will fulfill you. The joy and purpose of your life is in your hands to mold, shape and live. Yours will not be a life of quiet desperation, but one of meaning, value, giving and being more than you ever dreamed you could be. And have fun doing it! Remember:

A Tribute to Warren Bennis, “The Father of Leadership”

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Thanks to my friend a constant source of inspiration, Michael M. Reuter

Bill George, professor of management practice at Harvard Business School and author, wrote of the passing of Warren Bennis, American scholar, organizational consultant and author:

“… a giant oak has fallen with an impact felt throughout the world…. Just as Peter Drucker was “the father of management,” Warren Bennis will be remembered as “the father of leadership.” It was Warren who first said leadership is not a set of genetic characteristics, but rather the result of the lifelong process of self-discovery. As he once wrote: ‘The most dangerous leadership myth is that leaders are born – that there is a genetic factor to leadership. This myth asserts that people simply either have certain charismatic qualities or not. That’s nonsense; in fact, the opposite is true. Leaders are made rather than born.’

Warren Bennis found his joy and love of life not in positional power, but personal power. He wrote: “I realized my personal truth. I was never going to be able to be happy with positional power. What I really wanted was personal power: having influence based on my voice. My real gift is what I can do in the classroom or as a mentor.” The following are quotes of the rich legacy of teaching he left us.

“Becoming a leader is synonymous with becoming yourself. It is precisely that simple, and it is also that difficult.”
“Leaders must encourage their organizations to dance to forms of music yet to be heard.”
“Leaders know the importance of having someone in their lives who will unfailingly and fearlessly tell them the truth.”
“The manager has his eye on the bottom line; the leader has his eye on the horizon.”
“Leaders should always expect the very best of those around them. They know that people can change and grow.”
“Great things are accomplished by talented people who believe they will accomplish them.”

And so it is with great leaders – to influence with their voice, sharing their gifts of leadership that others may develop. To Warren Bennis, we all say: ‘Thank you, our dearest teacher and friend for helping us grow… to be more than we ever dreamed we could be… and more… so much more.

Let your voice be heard. There is only one beautiful and special you whose voice is unique in eternity.

Have a beautiful day and a magnificent week!!!

Mike

Contact Information:
Michael M. Reuter
Director, The Gerald P Buccino Center for Leadership Development
Stillman School of Business
Seton Hall University
Tel: (Office) 973.275.2528; (Mobile) 908.419.6060
Email: Michael.Reuter@shu.edu

How to Lead When You are Not in Charge

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I received this from my good friend and mentor:

In their Harvard Business Review Blog, How to Lead When You’re Not in Charge, Gary Hamel and Polly LaBarre share their thoughts on “the attributes of individuals who can inspire others and multiply their impact.”

They are seers — individuals who are living in the future, who possess a compelling vision of “what could be.” As human beings, we’re constantly looking forward, and we love to sign on with individuals who are already working on “the next big thing.”

They are contrarians — free of the shackles of conventional wisdom and eager to help others stage a jailbreak. It’s exciting to be around these free-spirited thinkers who liberate us from the status quo and open our minds to new possibilities.

They are architects — adept at building systems that elicit contribution and facilitate collaboration. They leverage social technologies in ways that amplify dissident voices, coalesce communities of passion and unleash the forces of change.

They are mentors — rather than hoarding power, they give it away. Like Mary Parker Follett, the early 20th-century management pioneer, they believe the primary job of a leader is to create more leaders. To this end, they coach, tutor, challenge and encourage.

They are connectors — with a gift for spotting the “combinational chemistry” between ideas and individuals. They help others achieve their dreams by connecting them with sponsors, like-minded peers, and complementary resources.

They are bushwhackers — they clear the trail for new ideas and initiatives by chopping away at the undergrowth of bureaucracy. They’re more committed to doing the right thing than to doing things right.

They are guardians — vigilant defenders of core values and enemies of expediency. Their unflinching commitment to a higher purpose inspires others and encourages them to stand tall for their beliefs.

They are citizens — true activists, their courage to challenge the status quo comes from their abiding commitment to doing as much good as possible for as many as possible. They are other-centered, not self-centered.

In beautiful simplicity they summarize these attributes saying: “All these roles are rooted in the most potent and admirable human qualities — passion, curiosity, compassion, daring, generosity, accountability and grit. These are the qualities that attract allies and amplify accomplishments. These are the DNA strands of 21st-century leadership.”

These attributes are the roles that great leaders assume on their journey. It is in their being – these magnificent human qualities they possess – that their great doing is manifested. Be, at every precious moment of your life, more than you ever dreamed you could be. And have fun doing it. Life is so very good.

Have a beautiful day and a magnificent week!!!

Mike

Contact Information:
Michael M. Reuter
Director, Center for Leadership Development
Stillman School of Business
Seton Hall University
Tel: (Office) 973.275.2528; (Mobile) 908.419.6060
Email: Michael.Reuter@shu.edu

Connections

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A dear friend, mentor, and wise teacher, sent this to me:

A very dear friend recently shared with me composer and conductor Eric Whitacre’s TED video, a virtual choir 2000 voices strong. It is Whitacre’s beautiful and incredible story of creating a choir of voices from across the world – collecting the blended voices of 2,051 videos from 58 different countries, then magically combining them into the beautiful work Sleep, the Virtual Choir. I implore you gently to invest a precious 14 minutes and 34 seconds of your life to experience, learn and enjoy the magnificent beauty of what could be – in our business, personal life and community – when we sing with one voice.

Whitacre was struck by two learnings from his experience: “The first is that human beings will go to any lengths necessary to find and connect with each other…. And the second is that people seem to be experiencing an actual connection. It wasn’t a virtual choir. There are people now online that are friends; they’ve never met. I feel a closeness to this choir — almost like a family.” His words give pause for reflection to great leaders. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, poet, wrote: “In nature we never see anything isolated, but everything in connection with something else which is before it, beside it, under it and over it.” It is the great leaders’ challenge and joy of bringing people together with a common, shared purpose. Jim Collin’s captures this in his words “the right people on the bus.” When this occurs, there is magic and the world hears the true sound of music. Be it a trio, quartet, quintet or choir, each voice brings its beautiful richness and individuality and adds to the song’s magnificence and meaning. May your music fill the hearts, minds and souls of those whom you touch. May yours be a song without end.

Have a beautiful day and a magnificent week!!!

Mike

Contact Information:
Michael M. Reuter
Director, Center for Leadership Development
Stillman School of Business
Seton Hall University
Tel: (Office) 973.275.2528; (Mobile) 908.419.6060